music post: a Standard Christmas.

Okay, yes, I realize that it’s been quite a while since an update.  And I’ll have a real one soon, I promise! But for now: here’s Secret Government Eggo Project III: THE RECKONING a Standard Christmas.  (Yes, the period is part of the title.)  Called such both because it has become a standard part of our Christmas season, and also because it’s full of jazz standards.  Yes, we think we’re unbearably clever.

Please give it a listen, and let me know what you think! It is also available for purchase on my Bandcamp site!

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a little bit of early Christmas cheer!

I never posted anything from last year’s Secret Government Eggo Project; I don’t remember why I didn’t.  I’m sure it had to do with  my many and varied insecurities; I just didn’t want to put myself out there last year.  Sometimes it’s just disheartening to be met with a resounding “meh”, you know what I mean?

This year, in the interests of Doing It Anyway (sort of my motto for the past few months), I’d love to share with you some of last year’s Secret Government Eggo Project II: Electric Boogaloo err…a (mostly) Disney Christmas!  We also did covers of “That’s How You Know” from Enchanted, “A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes” from Cinderella, “When Somebody Loved Me” from Toy Story 2, “Part of Your World” from The Little Mermaid, and Vienna Teng’s “The Last Snowfall.”  These three are my favorite performances; Maestro joins me on “I See The Light” as Eugene. :)

(Here’s a link to my Bandcamp site, where you’ll also find 2011’s Secret Government Eggo Project.  Hopefully before too long this year’s Secret Government Eggo Project III: THE RECKONING will also be up!)

I hope your holiday season has been joyous and not too stressful so far, my dear darlings!  If you get the chance to listen, please let me know what you think!

vlog: December is here!

(That means November is over!)

[vimeo https://vimeo.com/81215803]

“A capital-I Issue…that’s more like a Z. A capital-Z Issue. Zissue.”

This ended up being  a ton of work (my very first “edited” video! in that I clipped out a bit and had to stitch two videos together! poorly! and then I had to figure out how to convert it! look at me learning new things!) considering I look sickly and weird here. I wanted to get this done finally though! SO HERE IT IS!

vimeo! youtube!

but somehow, I can see just exactly how I’d be.

Gosh you guys!  I have been TERRIBLE over the past few weeks, have I not?  I’m stealing a few minutes before bed tonight (well, when I should already be in bed, really) to update.

In short, here’s what I’ve been working on –

  • I ended up being called in for two more days of extra work on the same movie!  Again, not really supposed to talk about it, but it’s definitely an enjoyable day’s work.  I don’t know how much extra work I’ll end up doing, for lots of reasons.  Maybe that’ll be the subject of my next vlog?
  • I had my first rehearsal for the Christmas show at the House of the Seven Gables a couple of weeks ago – I’ll be playing Beth March this time!
  • I had…one other audition? I think?  That I ended up not getting.
  • Last week, we had a rehearsal for the singing competition and I had to bail early to go to class so I have no idea what everyone sounds like?
  • Speaking of which, the competition is this Saturday!!!
  • L & I are going to spend Saturday morning catching up on recording a bunch of stuff we’ve practiced but not performed
  • Maestro and I’s Secret Government Eggo Project (III: THE RECKONING) is well underway!

In non-performing-related-but-busyness-related news, I’ve also been attempting National Novel Writing Month, I started a new job!, and schoolwork has been piling up.  Part of the reason I decided to do NaNoWriMo this year is that I am often better at managing my time when I’m a little overbooked (because I have to be!).  Hopefully I’ll be able to do a vlog or monovlog again in the next week or so!

I also want to thank David-Matthew Barnes for stopping by my blog with some incredibly kind words.  I am still a little bit beside myself!

the secret government eggo project is nigh.

And the Secret Government Eggo Project is a go!

PC finished arranging last night, and he and I finished burning and assembling CDs this afternoon, so the Secret Government Eggo Project is officially done!

As you all might have guessed, the Secret Government Eggo Project is, actually, an album. A Christmas album, to be exact! In the interests of putting myself out there, I’ve decided to share some of the album with all of you that have traveled along on my journey with me!

(Eventually I will write about my ~*feelings*~ with regards to this, but not just yet.)

christmas!: or the secret government eggo project

Click on the album art above to be taken to my brand spanking new Bandcamp site, where you can listen to and download a sampling of tracks from the album! (I still haven’t figured out most of it yet, you’ll have to forgive me!)

Happy Holidays, everyone!

when the snow lay round about, deep and crisp and even.

I have been deep, deep into self-loathing mode for the past couple of weeks, at least as far as singing (and acting, and Oh God What Am I Doing With My Life Someone Please Just Throw Me Off A Cliff So I Don’t Need To Make Decisions) goes. Which is why I haven’t been updating, despite the fact that yet more progress has been made on the Secret Government Eggo Project and the Christmas show goes up this weekend.

I figured no-one would want to hear about how yet another session went by where I started off with the highest of hopes but then plummeted back down into the valley of self-loathing and decided to call off the project entirely, only to have a fight with PC and decide not to abandon it after all. I figured no-one would want to hear yet again about how I loathe the sound of my own singing voice. And I’m probably right, so that’s the last of it (FOR NOW, she intoned ominously).

So! Progress actually HAS been made on the SGEP, and this week we’re looking to work almost every day to get my contributions (such as they are) all wrapped up. And then the magic of trying to make it sound good starts, a task that I do not envy. (Hahaha I lied about being done with the self-loathing.)

This weekend is the first weekend of the Christmas show – yay! We have dress rehearsal on Thursday and then the show starts again! I am looking forward to it, while also trying to keep an ear to the ground for anything that might be coming up soon. I am enjoying this – I mean, come on, I’m getting paid to play a teenaged Amy March at this point and sit around a beautiful historical house for a couple of hours in costume – but I look forward to getting to audition for things again, as well.

Oh, and someone contacted me about – essentially – doing photoshoots for a graphic novel, which might be interesting! I have to do a little bit of research and then also dig up my high-quality headshots to send along (as an “audition”). Note to self: remember to do that tonight. That might be fun, if I did get it!

Tonight, though, PC and I get down to business to defeat the huns to finish up the SGEP. I will stay positive! I will, I will!

shut your eyes and sing to me.

809334th verse, same as the first.

I probably don’t need to regale you all yet again with the tales of my low self-esteem and various Issues with my singing voice, but I’m going to force myself to do it anyway because maybe addressing some of these issues will help me sort them out.

…aaaand of course after I write that I immediately distract myself with something else. Good job there.

Continue reading

you hear the door slam and realize there’s nowhere left to run.

And with that, the Halloween season is over, and my stint at my first paid acting job is up.

I am sad to see it go, though it is a different sadness than the sadness that comes after a weekend’s worth of performances. Having two or three months of rehearsal and then just a weekend of performance time is (I think) one of the injustices of community theatre. I understand why it happens – renting the space is always very expensive – but it seems such an awful lot of work and bonding only to not see those people again after just a weekend!

With a month-long run and not an awful lot of rehearsal time (and the fact that I’m always That Weird Girl in a cast & don’t like to go out drinking), there wasn’t as much bonding, and we did the show every five-ten minutes for four hours three nights a week, so I definitely feel like I got to perform a lot. And mainly isolated – only a couple of people had scenes with each other rather than monologues. So it was a very different experience! I enjoyed it, most definitely, and I will miss it – but I am also grateful for a short break!

Thankfully I’ll be returning to the same place to be a part of the Christmas show, so I won’t have to miss it for too long. That, and I am thrilled that I already have something professional lined up for the next season. I am pleased that our director liked me enough to want me to come back!

It looks like those rehearsals will start up next week, but it’s a similar rehearsal schedule as this last show (that is, minimal). Since the scene I’m in is from Little Women, I do have my sisters (hee!) to rehearse with, so that will be fun! The shows are shorter, and there aren’t as many of them – thank goodness, since I don’t want to miss the entire Christmas season like I did the Halloween season! – but it will definitely be fun, too!

Plus, now work must begin in earnest on our Secret Government Eggo Project if it’s to be ready for Christmas! <3

I could have been a famous singer, if I had someone else’s voice.

I feel that the title of this post is pretty self-explanatory (though it is also a song lyric).

Sunday night – and it was night, my maestro is quite nocturnal – PC and I began our Secret Government Eggo Project. I, of course, began with a sense of trepidaton bordering on full-blown panic. With my heart in my throat, fingers vibrating with fear, I asked him “why? Why? Why is this so scary?” (Sometimes I repeat things three times for no reason.)

“I can’t answer that for you,” he said, and took my hand. I clutched at him and he squeezed my hand just hard enough to hurt. And away we went.

(I didn’t hold his hand the entire time, though, he did have to conduct me. Which, strangely, helps.)

In any case, I didn’t wheedle my way out of it completely (I can be very convincing when I am afraid of doing something!) and we got a lot of good material despite it being past midnight when we finished. All in all, it was more exhausting than the four-hour shift I had at my show the night previous.

If I keep doing this, maybe it will be like driving – I start off petrified and panicky, but eventually it won’t be that big of a deal to me. Like driving, I’ll still be constantly vigilant (because if you do driving wrong you can, you know, die), but I will be more comfortable and less inclined to panicked crying. One can only hope.

He really is very patient with me, he’s somehow struck the balance between not letting me get away with anything and not wounding my delicate flower feelings. (Delicate floral feelings?) I’m enjoying it, so far – the work that he’s done is beautiful, as usual, and I enjoy working with him. I just hope I’m not ruining it completely with my voice. D:

hold on: one more time, with feeling.

So, uh, I guess I never did write how opening weekend went! Oops!

Opening weekend went really well! It was nice, the first weekend is shorter than subsequent weekends (7:30-9:30 as opposed to 7-11), so it was like easing in to what the rest of the month is going to be like. I do have to stock up on cough drops (I’m talking near-constantly for the entire time I’m there!) but other than that, I really like it! You can see everyone you’re talking to, which is different than being onstage – it’s basically people standing in a room with you. It can make it a little bit awkward when you’re looking out at people and some of them are wide-eyed and hanging on your every word and then others are whispering to the person next to them.

Or when you have a famous person in the audience, which happened Saturday night. I had been warned beforehand but still when I saw a face that was familiar from movies and television I sort of got a bit of a mental jolt. My character is supposed to be a bit flustered anyway, so hopefully that worked out all right! Unfortunately, the gentleman in question had to listen to my monologue twice because the person in the room after mine got backlogged and about half of his group got stuck. So: sorry, famous guy! Hopefully I was entertaining on the second go-round as well as the first.

That happened for three or four groups on Saturday night, actually, which is definitely the most awkward situation that I’ve had thus far (seeing half of the same group when I walk into my room again, looking awkward and trying to get up the secret staircase to the next room). Thankfully, the director had a talk with the person after me in the show and helped her find a way to streamline everything so that we don’t get backlog anymore. (Also, it’s more fun when the group doesn’t know there’s a secret staircase in the room!) Everything in the show is timed really, really carefully, so that when one person takes a minute longer than they should, there’s a ripple effect affecting the rooms that come prior to them and breaks the whole rhythm of the show. Sunday night, we definitely did not have that issue: we had a steady flow of people and zero backlog!


In other news, I haven’t had a singing lesson in SO LONG and I really need to have another one soon. Between getting sick, the wedding, and this show going up (and being exhausted all the time) I haven’t had a spare moment to email GG. Maybe next week! Hopefully next week.

In other other news, since we’ve both been sick and busy and also doing regular relationshippy stuff (shock! horror!), PC and I haven’t had the chance to start on our Secret Government Eggo Project yet. He mentioned the other night that he was going to start working on one of the first songs so hopefully soon!